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Well,I can't exactly remember the time before I knew I wasn't wanted.I've heard stories about how when I was a tiny
little baby,my mom would ask my older brothers and sisters to feed me.They'd eat my food themselves and then tell my mother,"Hey,somethings
wrong with the baby.She won't stop crying."My first actual memory is at the age of 4.We had just moved into a big 3 story
house in some small town in Wisconsin.I was all excited,as kids will be.I ran through the house,looking at stuff and yelling
excitedly.Apparently the previous tenants hadn't gotten all there stuff out yet and I of course,had to zero in on it.There
was a Mickey Mouse telephone on the end table by the bed.I,being 4 years old,picked it up and pretended to talk into the reciever.Next
thing I know,I hear"Get your damn hands off that,it doesn't belong to you!" "WHACK!"Needless to say,I started crying.Now,we
all know that was the wrong thing to do.Oh,buddy,did I get it then.Not only had I touched someone else's belonging,Iwas being
a cry-baby! I mean,after all,by 4 years old,you should be able to take a belt to the chops,right?
Then we have the school years.Okay,kindergarten...My first day,I got called names,had my hair pulled,cried nonstop to
go home,got sent home and told not to come back until the next year.My mom came and picked me up,she wouldn't even talk to
me.I was a big dissapointment!!Stupid,pitiful and ugly.I got used to being pitiful and ugly.But I always hoped to become brilliant
in some way.Stupid was and is the one thing above all that I didn't want pointed out.Now,I don't mean to say my mother said
these things to me,she mostly just ignored me or occassionally,gave me a well deserved whack.But during every grade of my
school career,it was the overwhelming consensus,that I,Carmela Harris,was ugly and therefore not worthy of any attention,except
the few seconds it took to point out that I was too ugly by far and therefore should not be allowed to mingle with normal
people.I never had one friend,all through school.I am serious,NOT ONE!
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